What is your opinion? I need some advise?

I'm not going to tell you "welcome to the real world" as the others are doing. I think you already know you are in the real world.

First, I commend your idea about downsizing. I think you should go that route. However, I strongly urge you to downsize with your wife and baby son. You and your wife need to have a firm, adult conversation about the finances. I think you need to tell her your feelings concerning changing your apartment to a cheaper one. If you sit down with your wife to discuss this, make up a list of things that you both can do without, ie., downsize, get rid of, have a yard sale, etc. Ask her opinion and her thoughts. I wouldn't try to shoulder this yourself and you shouldn't have to. Both of you made the financial mess you are in so both of you need to figure out a way out of it.

I think your wife's negative reactions and your constant fights are the product of her hurt feelings that you would even remotely suggest that you separate to "find yourself..." The time for finding yourself ended when your wife had your son. There's no time for that now and separating from your wife and son will, I promise you, cause serious animosity. Especially for the reasons which you related to her for wanting to separate. I'd knock my husband into a third world if he told me what you told your wife.

As far as your business is concerned, you may have to shelve that idea for a bit. I commend you for thinking forward and having dreams and goals, however, you can only deal with one problem at a time and your financial wellbeing and that of your family should be dealt with first before you attempt to tackle the other issues.

I wish you and your family good luck in weathering your storm.

I'll tell you what, why don't you go back to your mothers and keep the baby and let her live the single life! That's a great idea, see how you cope! Isn't it nice to say that she's holding you back, isn't it a pity you didn't cop this before you married and especially before you had a baby. It sounds to me like you'd like to let her down gently so that you can sneak away for good and leave her holding the baby living in her mother's with no life.

You obviously need to leave your luxurious flat and there are no two ways about that and you could sell your car now instead of waiting until you're single. You should also try and help your wife find an interest that could turn into a course and a future income instead of a dead end restaurant job. There's loads of options besides trying to do a legger when the going gets tough!

You both need to live in the real world!

Your wife needs to realise that you must move into a smaller house/flat to save money and pay off debts, otherwise you will lose your current home and have nowhere to live.

You need to think about your wife and child aswell as yourself, I currently am a single mother, I work Full-time and am studying for a degree. You can fit things in, when your wife is at work your son should be in bed. You can study then, I do!!!

Your wife will feel angry at the thought of you suggesting that she seperates from you for a while.

Sit down and explin things in full, and try and convey the seriuosness of the situation. Tell her what could happen if you do not move into a cheaper home!!

You should not consider leaving your wife...and definately not sending her away to her Mother! You are a couple now...a family and you should weather the storm together. Your situation is nothing new...it is what many young families suffer...your wife is also working...you need to cut back somehow...it seems to me that moving to a cheaper flat would help...sharing with another couple would be BAD...you have a child and need to protect it...another couple are basically strangers and you should not expose your child to strangers. Do you have to do the courses you are doing if you are planning on a business? Why not work extra hours instead? Also...why do you have to go aboad for the business? Can you not do it in the UK? It seems to me that you don't like being part of a family and are looking for an easy way out.

I would say move to somewhere cheap ie Burnley, Blackburn where rent is £200--£250 per month for a 2 bed terraced house (some time furnished or partly furnished) council tax will be cheaper as u r a student...try using ebay for ur household shopping except food. start cutting costs by switching to cheaper options. But before u move searching a job for ur self first as finding a job can be difficult in these areas. the idea of seperating ur wife is not good at the moment. try moving to a cheaper house first.

I think you need to live with the decisions you have made. You have a family, they come first. Sorry, your DREAMS are not being realized, but in order to be a good husband and father you need to keep your family together. I'm sure there are ways you can save without her moving across the country? I'd be a little worried if i were her. Maybe you need to take a on a part time job, and stop using credit, have you thought about renting out a room in your place?

If the mom will take the child that would be great she needs to support ya here you get a cheaper apartment both work 2 jobs if ya have to but make sure ya find time for each other...Women are sensitive to the time spent together and try that way or ur going to have to stick to what yousaid she and the child go home sell the car grab more hours somewhere else save and save then pullit all together in the 4 months but thats going to be hard either way...A no its not ez personally i think ya got married to young child on the way or not its to young ya had no plan and see now ya have one with all the extras there hard! But something has to give both need to be mature about this.......just assure her ya love her and that all the good things ya want for them and you will come becasue of the way your thinking but she needs to work with you on this ............Tell her your not gonna just settled for what is ya want more! And ya need her help! Ok good luck!

Welcome to the world of being a grown-up!

If I were your wife, I would not want the option you gave her of separating for four months or living with other people. I would not like those options at all, at all! And what decent mother is going to want to be without her baby for more than a few days??? I can see her major reluctance if you told her that you want her to leave for 4 - 6 months so you can find yourself again. That was funny! What were you thinking?

Keep brainstorming. Solve this together as a team. Maybe you need to move to the outskirts of town to a more affordable flat.

Id say welcome to the real world, but a second job is not really in the cards as you have to watch the child. Time spent is much more valuable to them than money spent.... It seems like you both have no issues communicating about how you feel about this, but you fail to compromise. I assume she is ok with this, but you want to fix the problem. She doesn't want to separate out of fear you will not come back, that's a good thing.

My advise is to seek out a financial counselor, someone who can look at your finances and give you options to getting rid of your debt. Maybe if the options given come from a third party she may be more willing to follow through??

sounds to me u cant live in ur current place as its too expensive u cant get wht u cant afford u really need to sit ur wife down and tel her this or come another 2/5 yrs u will be in an even bigger mess than u are now its team work ur wife needs to open her eyes!!!!