There is a raccoon in my evergreen pine. Tree. What? Should. I! Do. ?

Why do anything?

nothing.  it will leave on its own come dark -- it needs to forage nightly for food

if it's living there, call a wild life center and ask them

Just leave it alone. I get coons in my trees all the time, since I live in the country. They don't hurt anything. You can't scare them out. They just climb higher. If it really bothers you, put some food outside, go back inside for an hour or two, and you'll find it on the ground eating the food!

What you should NOT do is drop out of sixth grade.

My advice is to go out an shake the tree and yell at the raccoon.  If you have a dog, get it to come out and bark at it.  Keep this up until you are tired.  Then go back in the house.  The raccoon will leave once you are gone, and it won't come back.