Is this a Malaysian attitude I wasn't aware of?

Most Malaysians I've met seem very warm, but the men often frustrated me.

I grew up in America and went to live in Malaysia for a while. I was really shocked by how men sometimes talked down to women. If I had a problem, say, I was expecting an important document and it was taking a very long time to get to me, I would ask the person privately (in a friendly and patient manner) how much longer I can expect to wait for it. A man would get really upset and start waving his arms around telling ME that I was being too emotional when he's the one who's visibly upset and I'm only doing my job.

I was very surprised by this and noticed when other men made job related inquiries to one another they were never met with this type of reaction.

I was told women can't read maps because they're brains can't comprehend them. This is just not true, I can read maps just fine and I met plenty of Malay MEN who could not.

Another instance was when I was with my housemate from yemen. A man asked her if all women from Yemen were so beautiful and if he could pick out a couple wives there. He spoke about finding a wife as though he were shopping for groceries! Naturally my housemate (and her husband when he found out) were very offended by this.

I have also met males who were very kind and helpful while living in Malaysia, but I can confirm your suspicion that there is a lot of misogyny in Malaysia, which is unfortunate because I met a lot of very strong competent women who were clearly an asset to the work force and the community. Some men recognized this and were supportive.. others.. not so much. Women should just continue being strong and the men who are supportive will out number the ones who treat women poorly.

You had every right to be upset in your situation. Don't let men tell you you are inferior because you have emotions. That is a HUMAN thing, not a western thing. Respecting other people (including women!) is not a westernized way of thinking either. Woman have accomplished so much in the eastern world. For example the founder of the first University in the 9th century like the ones we have today was a Muslim woman. Don't let this guy trouble you. It sounds like he doesn't know what he's talking about.

Hi Emerald ... sorry to hear of the lost of your dear one. I know how it feels. I lost both my mom and dad as well and yes its too painful to bear. Yes, we do have some out spoken people here in YAM.

He did say he didn't mean anything from that question and was expecting a funny answer..but yes he acted in an insensitive way..

my advice, just ignore such person, its not worth thinking about what he said cause probably he is not a Christian and does not know God's love, so they speak that way. Right now you are mourning. Spent time with your family, paint. Say a prayer asking God to give you peace inside. He loves you too much to see you cry and in pain. Only He can strengthen you. Also pray for the one that hurt you. It really helps. We have a living God. He is not dead. He sees your tears. He is there for you.

As for that YAM fellow, just ignore him. Its not worth it.

This verse is for you. Please read John 14:27

Cheers ! :-)

Before he posted that question, did he know about your loss? If not, you're being oversensitive. You can choose not to answer that question in the first place if you find that it's offensive. I too had lost my dear ones, yet I can still laugh despites the sadness in me. Next time, don't generalise people as you're accusing the other Malaysians too to be insensitive etc., over a few people you find out as irritating, unsensitive etc. Most of Malaysians aren't like what you've stated, don't because of one person offended you, you're saying all of us the same like him. I'm sorry to hear your loss, but be strong, you're not the only one out there who've lost your dear ones, change your attitude and be positive in life.

I 'm sorry for your loss. But I would like to be honest with you that you are pretty blunt at times with your opinions. You sounds like a very knowledgeable person but try not to be too forthright with your answers. You felt hurt by him asking you are you "PMSing", why not try to put your shelf in his shoes when you commented ugly words like "Bastard" to him and ask yourself how should he feel.

It's only a Question or many Questions that people raised but why do you get so upset most of the time. Just like others said, you can choose not to answer them. Again, this is just my opinion.

a million it relatively is too ordinary to get a driver's licence in Malaysia. 2 it relatively is too ordinary to bribe the police in Malaysia. 3 Tidak apa physique of suggestions isn't a sturdy using physique of suggestions. 4 The roads are not o.k. built.

This whole thing is a joke.

I asked something which has nothing to do with you. You answered saying I'm "cold heart, narrow minded, extremist, and misogynist bastard." to which I responded saying "are you PMSing?".

And now you're here to gain some public sympathy. Seriously, if you're emotionally so unstable then its better not to answer my questions, attack me and then cry when I reply. I can't stand drama queens.

Also, don't expect a person to say "aww, I'm so sorry for your loss" after you publicly insult them.

Hi my friend Emerald, i think i know who's the person in YAM you mentioned, just let him be. this is a cyber world and everyone is anonymous. about the loss of your loved ones, make it a challenge and view it as a positive effect. maybe this can teach you more and more about life.

Attitude and personality have nothing to do with here the person lives.

haiya somebody make you cry meh? dont worry lah, next time dont answer his questions mah

i make you laugh now, come 'cak cak, ahhhh cak' smile smile, har see i make you smile right, this one small matter lah dont worry

come i sing for you this song my friend gave me ' jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, stupid jill forget her pill and now they have a daughter' hahaha, make you laugh ye !