Friend's Cat Died of "Broken Heart"/WON'T Get New Cat Fixed?

I have had to leave my cats for much longer than 3 days, and not one of them died "of a broken heart", although they did act displeased with me when I returned until they "forgave" me. Of course if I was gone for more than a couple of days, I would have someone check on them, but those visits were only for a few minutes, so I do agree with you that your friends cat died of something explainable, NOT a broken heart. As for the new kitty, I understand that you're in a horrible position if this friend will not listen or take advice from you, but if you get some hard information on the death rate of un-fixed animals versus fixed ones the possibility of cancer, the urge to roam, spray and get into fights, and of course, the overpopulation problem she'd just be adding to, and present it to her slowly, gradually and with the idea that you are only trying to help her, knowing how much she loved her other cat and how much losing this one would hurt, hopefully she would eventually listen to you. Another possibility is that if you have a compassionate vet, (or she had one) talk to them and explain the situation and just maybe the vet will call her and explain the dangers of an unaltered cat and the myths revolving altering causing obesity/laziness, etc. Good luck to you!

I'm so sorry. I agree I don't think 3 days will make a cat die. Maybe she felt guilty about being in jail.

I did have 2 elderly cats & the surviving one got sick and I had to put him to sleep 3 months after the 1st one died. I think he really missed her.

As for your 2nd question, tell her by 5-6 months they have developed all their secondary gender traits: like a larger head on males and being larger in general. My 1st cat got a "bit" calmer, but really calmed down when I got him a sister.

My 3rd cat's personality didn't change at all, he was always a cutie pie.

It sounds like your friend really attached to her new cat & is afraid to "lose" another cat figuratively. Sounds like she's still grieving her former cat.

Tell her neutering the cat will keep him healthier, especially his kidneys. Many cats especially males get kidney disease and eventually die from it & the cats don't feel good. It also costs lots more $ for vet bills,

Good Luck.

She's an adult responsible for her own actions (or inactions). Let her be and leave her to learn her own lessons. When he starts spraying all over her house and stinking it up, she'll soon discover that she needs to have him neutered. I'm assuming that he is an indoor-only cat and don't have to preach about her cat roaming the neighborhood.

Sorry to sound so glib, but you really should just let her learn her own lessons. Those are the best learned, not just from a friend giving unwarranted advice. I know your intentions are good, but you should just let her be.

That us so sad. For you and her, because you are trying to help her and she won't let you. Since she doesn't want to admit that she might have played a part in his death, just drop it. What's done is done and i guess it doesn't really matter HOW he died since he did die. As for the new kitty, fixing it would actually make it a lot nicer, and prevent urinating, yowling, and roaming, which i think is better. comfort her because she is your friend, but don't let her overfeed her new cat, even if it means that you have to let her know, or take it for a walk. let her know that instead of treats, playing with it will work just as well. best wishes :)

Tell her to straighten up her act & stay of jail would be a good place to start.

Getting a cat neutered can change their personality, but not in any drastic way. It will make him less prone to spraying all over the house to mark his territory, it also can help prevent diseases down the road & he won't be adding to to unwanted cat population.

Since she has completely anthropomorphisied her relation ship with her cat, and refuses to listen to reason I would not expect her to pay any attention to what you have to say about it. It does not alter their personality to the degree of being a different cat, just as having a vasectomy doesn't make a man any less masculine. It will reduce the urge to spray on everything he considered his and will help curb his desire to roam.

Tell her boy cats get a lot friendlier if you get them neutered. They will stay at home while unfixed ones WILL try to run. There will be pee all over the house when he starts to spray. AND she will be contributing to unwanted animals being born. These animals can/will starve to death, be put down at a kill shelter, or be used for medical experimentation. These thing could also happen to her cat when he runs and gets lost.

tell her they fight and roam for weeks if not done,they dont live so long and also will spray when older,it will make cat more freindly if done as well

Tell her he will get testicular cancer ( in the nuts).

Well, if she really want's to not have her cat spayed, then I guess you can't really do anything about it.